Out of Reach
by Oceansportrait
Summary: Lita falls for the one man she can never have.....


Title: Out of Reach

Summary: Lita falls for the one man she can never have….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I need some time to think, I'll see you around…I guess," Matt turned around and walked out of the room.

Lita collapsed on the couch, sobs wracking throughout her.

She and Matt had being going out for several months, steady for two. Everything had been going smoothly, with several fights, but that was expected, as in any relationship. But lately Matt was fighting with her about her wrestling. He thought that she shouldn't try such high-risk maneuvers, that one day it could end her career.

__

I want to live my life and this is how I choose to live it! She had tried to explain to Matt but nothing seemed to change his views. This had been the last straw for her. He had called her insensitive, that by taking such risks, that it made it seem as if she didn't care for Matt at all, and if she did, then she wouldn't do this, for him. 

__

I can't live my life this way, fighting. Isn't Matt the one? I thought he was but he's different now. Colder somehow. Lita lifted herself from the couch, wiping away her tears furiously. _Tears will get you no where Lita. Be tough, like Tori then maybe Matt wouldn't cheat on me. _Matt thought that she didn't know, but she wasn't blind. She had heard in the woman's locker room. How Tori had laughed at Lita about how pathetic she was, not keeping Matt interested enough to go looking for someone else to fulfill his needs. 

__

This isn't happening. 

She closed her eyes and held her hand to her ears, wishing it were all a dream.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

__

She was in a room. There was only a flickering light, making it hard to see. She heard the quiet tap tap of someone walking. Closer and closer, the sound came. "Who's there?" She cried out, but with no reply. The shadow neared, she tried to call out but found that she could not speak. An icy pair of hands encircled her neck. Tighter and tighter the grip became until she could no longer breath. She tried to struggle, but the person was just too strong. So weak…..

Someone was shaking her. Lita could feel tears on her cheeks, as she cried out. 

  
"It's ok Lita. Everything's going to be ok." The person said, hugging her briefly in a reassuring hug.

She felt herself calm almost immediately. "Thanks." She pulled away.

"That must have been one bad nightmare," Spike said putting his hand lightly on her shoulder.

Lita nodded, replying "It was, but I don't really feel like talking about it."

"Well ok…but if you ever need someone to talk to, you know where to find me." Spike patted her on the back before getting up.

Matt came back to the locker room just as Spike was leaving. 

"Hey Matt," Spike nodded.

"Hey…" Matt looked at Spike then at Lita then back at Spike again.

"If you need anything Lita, you know you can always talk to Molly or me. Remember that ok?" Spike smiled.

Lita nodded, she could feel Matt's gaze on her. Once she had felt special, like she was cared for when he had gazed at her, but now, she only felt uncomfortable.

Once Spike had left, Matt casually asked, "What was that all about?"

"I just had a nightmare," Lita said, avoiding his gaze.

"I thought you always talked to me about everything," Matt sounded hurt.

Lita got up, about to leave when she turned around saying "Well, things change."

__

What did I just do? I can't believe I just said that to Matt. He's already mad at me, now I've only made him madder.

With tears in her eyes, she rushed towards Spike's locker room before anyone could see her crying.

She held her head down, her hair covering her face. 

"Hi Lita…what's wrong?" Molly asked, when she had opened the door.

"I…I'm sorry, I didn't know where else to go. If you guys were busy I'll just go…" Lita's voice trailed off, knowing she didn't have anywhere else to go.

"Don't be silly, come on in," Molly said leading her into the locker room and onto the couch.

Molly got up saying "My match is up next, I'll have to go. I'll be right back once the match is over, it'll be in a jiffy." With that she jogged out of the room.

Spike turned to her, as if expecting some answers as to why Lita was in the middle of the hallway, in tears.

"I had a fight with Matt." Lita hung her head, waiting to hear the questions about what she had done to get into the fight. Nobody had ever asked if Matt had been the one who had initiated the arguments.

"Are you ok Lita? He didn't hurt you, did he?" Spike asked concerned.

Lita shook her head vigorously "Of course not, he's never laid a hand on me. Matt loves me." It sounded like she was trying to convince herself rather than Spike.

"Then what would make you so sad, enough to cry tears?"

"I had a fight with him again about my wrestling. He won't understand that this is my wrestling style and that I can't change it for anyone, not even him." Lita said bitterly.

"Remember you once told me that 'No man is worth your tears, and the one who is won't make you cry'? Why is Matt an exception? If you had tried to explain to him, then he should support you whatever you decide to do." 

Lita laughed, "Well I learned that isn't always true."

Spike looked her in the eyes, not laughing. "If you believed in it once, what made you change your mind?"

Lita shrugged, not even sure herself why she had. She had once believed in it so much, she had gone through high school living by that moral. After she had started going out with Matt, she found tears were just another part of their relationship.

"I…I guess, I don't know." Lita answered, playing with her hair like she always had done when she was nervous. "I'm not even sure I love Matt anymore, I miss his friendship more than anything. Ever since we started going out, he hardly hangs out with me unless he had to. If I knew that my friendship with him would be ruined, I never would have been in this."

"He doesn't deserve you Lita. You should be going out with someone who would treat you like you were the only person on earth that mattered. And if you find that in a friend, that's great I think you should go for it." 

"Well, I think I would have found him by now if he had existed." Lita wiped her tears from her eyes and got up. "Thanks Spike, I think this helped me a lot in making up my mind."

"Anytime, just think over everything before you take action, so you won't regret it." Spike said.

"I always do." Lita hugged him, and left.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Where'd Lita go?" Molly asked when she had gotten back from her match against Ivory.

"She went to find herself." 

Molly had a confused look on her face so he took her in his arms saying, "She went to make a decision." 

Molly giggled "You always were Santa's little helper, always helping everyone."

"Are you making fun of me?" Spike asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

Molly laughed harder replying "Maybe.."

"Well I'll show you who to make fun of." Spike caught her lips in a kiss.

"Who am I now?" Spike laughed once they had pulled away.

"You're definitely the most handsomest person I've ever seen." Molly smiled.

Spike picked Molly up. "And you're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen." He said, kissing the tip of her nose.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lita had started to spend more time with Spike, surprisingly finding more reassurance from him than she ever had from Matt.   
  
Jeff knew about how Matt had argued with Lita, and had even tried to stop one once, but when Matt had harshly told him to stay out of his business, he quietly abided. 

Spike had helped her reassure herself that accompanying Matt to ringside for his match against Spike was the right thing to do.   
  
Spike had told her "Whatever you have to do, know that I understand, if it means doing the hurricanrana, if that'll make everything with you and Matt go okay, then go for it."

Lita hugged him. "Thanks."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lita clapped happily when Matt had won. 

She slid into the ring, trying to raise Matt's hand but he pulled back.

Confused, Lita watched on as Matt got out of the ring, looking around as if he was searching for something.

When she saw what Matt was carrying in his hand, she gasped, partly from horror and from surprise.

Spike was pulling himself up, his back to Matt so he didn't see what Matt had planned in store for him. 

Lita ran up to Matt, trying to do everything she could think of to stop Matt from doing what he was about to do. "Come on Matt, let's start a celebration of our own, forget about Spike.." Lita tried to kiss Matt but he pushed her aside. 

Matt yelled for Spike to get up. Lita didn't know what to do. The crowd's reactions seemed deafening. 

When she found that there was nothing she could do other than what she was about to do, she did just that. 

Matt swung the chair. 

But the chair connected with Lita, instead of Spike, which it was directed to. 

Matt was in shock, he hadn't meant hit Lita, why she had jumped in front of Spike, he didn't know. Maybe to save Spike? She had been hanging out with Spike more often lately. 

Spike got herself ready, for the shooting pain that he was about to go through, but when it didn't come, he peered up. Matt was looking at him in shock? Spike looked down; Lita was lying on the ground, unconscious. Matt hadn't been looking at him in shock; he was looking at Lita. 

Spike gently shook her. "Lita, are you ok?" But she didn't reply. He realized it was serious when he saw that she was lying limply in his arms. The paramedics came rushing into the ring, carrying Lita onto a stretcher. Spike quickly jogged with them as they carried her up the ring. He glanced back at the inside of the ring. Matt was still there, unmoved, his face in his hands, disbelief on his face.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lita had recovered consciousness on her way to the hospital. 

She wasn't sure at all why she had just taken a chair shot for Spike. She never would have done that for Matt, she wasn't sure why she had been so willing to for Spike. 

__

"You know you've met the one when you would be willing to put your life on the life for him, when his life means more to you than yours." 

She finally realized why she had been acting oddly towards Spike lately.

She had fallen in love with Spike…and he was the one man she could never have.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lita had recovered quickly, her injuries not as harsh as the paramedics had detected.

As soon as she had arrived at the arena, Molly and Spike were waiting for her in the parking lot. Hand in hand.

__

Why couldn't I be the one in Molly's place? Am I not worthy?

She shook the thoughts from her mind. Lita got out of the car, forcing a smile onto her face. "Hey guys, what are you doing here out in the parking lot?"

Molly jumped excitedly. "Well, Spikey said that we should have waited for you inside but I just couldn't wait. Spike and me are getting married!" Molly showed her an emerald ring that rested on her left hand. 

All notion left Lita when she heard the news. "That…That's great…"

Molly tilted her head. "Something wrong Lita?"

She tried to keep her tears from falling but one managed to escape. "I have to go guys, I'll see you later."

__

Molly and Spike married? Now I'll never have a chance.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After the show had finished, Molly came up to her. 

"Are you ok?" Molly asked. 

Lita smiled a weak smile. "I'm sorry, I didn't know what got over me, was there something you wanted to say?"

Molly smiled. "Actually, yeah. I want you to be my Maid of Honor when Spikey and me marry in July"

Lita's eyes widened, if Molly had known Lita's feelings towards Spike, she would never have forgiven her, but here she was, asking her to be her maid of honor.

"I-I can't, I'm sorry."

Molly's face dropped, her eyes filled with hurt. "Why?"

Lita dropped her gaze, knowing if Molly looked into her eyes, she would be able to figure out what she was saying was a lie. "Family problems at home, I asked Vince for a couple of weeks off in July."

"Oh, ok. But can't you bring your whole family ------"

"No!" Lita sharply cut her off.

Molly seemed taken aback by Lita's tone of voice. 

Lita sighed, this wasn't going to be easy. "Listen, I'm sorry but I don't think my family will be able to make it. But tell me everything that happened in your wedding ok?"

"Okay." Molly agreed sadly, unhappy that her very best friend wouldn't be able to make it to her wedding. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Can't I just go and tell him that I love him, that I need him in his life?" She said, knowing that one day her feelings would destroy, if not, kill her.

Lita had come to Jeff for help, she knew that she just couldn't keep all the feelings she had in herself anymore than she needed to.

Jeff shook his head. "That would be a selfish thing to do. Molly and Spike are happy together, they belong together. Do you really want to get in the way of their relationship and go on living knowing that you destroyed something precious as what they have?"

Lita felt a tear slide down her cheek, knowing in her heart she could. "Why did I have to fall in love with someone I can never have? Why couldn't I have fallen in love with Matt? Things would have been so much easier."

  
Jeff brushed a strand of hair from her face. "If life went along smoothly without problems along the way, then life wouldn't really be worth living through."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

****

July Wedding

"Are you sure you don't want to go?" Jeff asked, putting an arm around Lita, concerned with the way she had begun to act the last couple of months, she seemed more withdrawn, wrestling only when she had to and leaving the arena quickly soon after.

Lita nodded her head. "I'm sure."

Jeff sighed, knowing that he wouldn't be able to make up her mind, left the hotel.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lita took a deep breath before getting out of her car. She had parked her car far away from the others so they didn't know she had come. 

Molly and Spike's wedding was outside, the bright blue sky and the promising warm sun. 

Lita watched silently from behind the trees, as Molly walked down the aisle.

Lita could feel her heart almost stopping when she caught a sight of Spike.

__

He looks so handsome.

Tears silently fell as she watched Molly lie her hand next to Spike's. They were looking deeply in each others eyes, as if nothing else mattered, as long as they were together. 

The priest had started the vows. When he read aloud "If anyone shall object to this marriage, say now or forever hold their peace." She had wanted to call out that she loved Spike, and that she needed him in his life. But she knew that was a selfish decision, Molly had done nothing to deserve, nor did Spike.

Molly and Spike exchanged rings, kissing each other. Lita had to look away, knowing it was more than she could bear to watch. 

Lita knew she would never be able to tell of her feelings towards Spike, especially not to him himself. She would have to be forever watching from the outside, wishing that she had the warmth and security of the love she had been looking for all her life. And when she had found it, the man had not returned her feelings, but rather, did not know of her feelings for him at all.

She cried her final tear, as she whispered.

__

I Love You Spike Dudley.

****

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Please R&R


End file.
